I should give up = Overwhelmed = Why bother?

Overwhelmed...Overwhelmed. Where in the pantheon of mental conditions does that one lie?

It's up there with rhetorical questions like "Why bother? (It won't work.)" and "You're not an X, why don't you just keep to what you normally do?" and finally "What was I thinking!".

It has a cousin..."Nobody cares...(?)" The question mark is actually important, because a statement of fact versus a question on that one show progression down an overwhelmed path.

I just had one of these moments.
The context?
I'm scoping a new product that I'm developing. It's handbags of all things...
It's right out of my comfort zone.
I've started making the first wobbly steps from "Pie in the sky" to "How am I going to actually do this?", and the early news is, wow, there's a long way to go and I'm feeling OVERWHELMED.
So I'm trying to figure out what are the ingredients of overwhelmed? If I can deconstruct that feeling, then I can start tackling it.

My Path . My Stress . My Feelings . My Story . My Relationships .

This is what I've come up with:
1 part Stress
2 parts Feelings
4 parts My Story.

Now, when I teach my Correctional Services Consumer Clients (prisoners) this system, I name all these elements on one hand.
"The thumb is Thumbing a ride to Better", that is, My Path, and I gesticulate with the motion.
"The index finger represents Stress..."
"The second finger is Feelings..."
"And if you don't sort Stress and Feelings, you're...?" I give the two up, "Your F*cked." A nod of understanding passes through the group.
"And your ring finger, that is Your Story, who you are, what you believe about your self ..."
"And you're pinky...?" I link it with my other pinky, "That 's Your Relationships."

OK, OVERWHELMED -so if I reflect on the above concise directive, if I don't tackle my Stress and my Feelings components of being overwhelmed, I'm you-know-what. [Gesticulate in your mind's eye with a two up of the first and second fingers. ]

My Stress . Over the adrenaline line? . Breath and grounding . Challenge fears now settled . 

OK my stress is there, probably because I'm tired, but I have not crossed the adrenaline line, I'm not sweating with a racing heart. Good, that means my head's not shut down with fight or flight thinking.

Breathing and relaxing my body -never hurts. And finally, ensuring my headspace is rational so I can start to challenge some of the stressful thoughts.

• You'll do a bad job
• You'll let everybody down 
• You'll make a fool of yourself
• You'll waste precious time and money
• You'll FAIL!

Yipes there it is. Good ol'fear.

OK, well, I can work with that.
Fear can keep us on our toes, if it is held at a manageable level, so I'll keep my eye on that one and just run with it.
Next...

My Feelings . Name it . Check for sneaky feelings . Watch them ride to the shore, (not get caught up in them ). 

Fear, we kind of established that above. What's under the fear, -hiding there? Wow, desperation, I'm investing a lot in this venture, -especially emotionally. I cling to it as a potential exit strategy from difficult clinical work, which I'm struggling with at the moment. Anything else? -Uncertainty, as this is new, -that'll do.

So what do I do? Watch them through to the shore, rather than getting caught up in all the emotion infected thinking. I note them swell up in me as a great tide, which probably started when I felt overwhelmed with the sense of "I should give up etc", and then diminish as they ride to the shore.

And finally, 

My Story . Vulnerable child self . habits of coping . Exalted adult self .

All right. Yes I'm feeling vulnerable, ill equipped and small, lost in a child like way. Well of course, this is new!

What habit of coping am I employing? Well a rather immature one that matches my sense of vulnerability. Another one i s wanting to flee ("Just give up"), seeking reassurance ("Why bother?" -waiting for a competent adult to reassure me and direct me with "Of course you should bother, your idea is fantastic etc").

 But no one's saying that, so I'm left still vulnerable ie the coping habit is not serving me well, and keeping me vulnerable.

Finally what would my Exalted Adult Self say? The one that just kicked butt and feels in control, the capable one? She's  confident that if any problem is broken down enough, it can be solved.

 Well she would comfort the vulnerable child-self, tell it to go to bed, and mention something about breaking big problems into small ones.

So there you have it. A single word like OVERWHELMED, is indeed, very complex. But...

If you break it down into it's component bits, maybe you'll see it coming and not get slugged by it next time?

Have a Betta Day!